As I sit here stuffing my face with cookies I wonder what the future me will feel like. The present me doesn’t give a hoot. He like the taste of cookies, the crumbs that fall on the floor don’t even bother him cause he knows it will be the future him who has to clean it up. The me of the past isn’t too upset either; he feels like the present me has earned it on his good behavior. He swam 6 miles this week, ran 13 miles, worked out and weight trained everyday as well. Surely the past me has earned the cookies for the present. And surely the future me will work off what ever cookies I haven’t yet.
If that doesn’t make any sense, let me explain. I (we) are all 4 people.
The Past You
The Present You
The Future You
The Person you’d like to be.
Now, it gets even dicier if you have friends or parents because you end up being who they want you to be or need you to be as well. So you turn into you and who your mom thinks you are. But assuming you hold true to yourself there are only 4 of you.
The way it should work:
If all four of you are on the same page it is a smooth ride. The present you works hard at achieving the a goal of creating who you are. This hard work becomes what you have done (the past you), giving the present you experience, knowledge, and confidence. Or inexperience, stupidity and insecurity, depending on what you have done in the past.
Some past people eat a bunch of cookies giving the present person a gut or a bunch of calories and the future lots of work to do. Some past people eat right and exercise, giving the present them a great body.
The past you affects the present you. That’s both good and bad news. Bad if you were a lazy ass-hole, good if you aren’t and good if you are because you can change. At any time the present you has the power to change the future you, regardless of what the past you has done.
I ate 9 Tim Tams while writing this, when I am done writing I will go swim another 2 miles and hit the weights in the gym. Some people might say if you were just a little more responsible in the present you wouldn’t have to work so hard in the future to makeup for a shit past.
And there it is.
If I could take from the past that which I need in the present to succeed in the future, I’d be one well oiled machine. And not four people fighting within the one body. But that is the burden of being me.
I know the person I want to be, I won’t let the past me fuck the future me by telling the present me he can’t get back on track. But, I can’t keep the present me from getting too far ahead.
